Wags To Riches Novelization
by iheartkatamari
Summary: A reimagining/retelling of the TV episode of the same name, in which the Pound Puppies try to find a home for a very destructive dog while trying to prevent Katrina from shutting down the pound.
1. A Walking Disaster

**This is basically a reimagining/retelling of an episode of the TV show. Some notable changes made are that the three Pound Puppies from the 1985 special (Violet, Barkerville and Scrounger) who didn't make the cut for the series are now part of the cast, and Flack and Tubbs, the two dognappers also from the 1985 special, are here too, and they're now Katrina Stoneheart's henchmen. (Sort of like Horace and Jasper to Cruella De Vil.) Some elements of the story have been altered too (But I won't give them away). I hope in the future to do novelizations of most of the other episodes, too, if not all of them; I also hope to include the Pound Purries (who appeared in the book "Kitten Companions") in future stories, as well as Dabney Nabbit. Please enjoy! **

It's a peaceable day. Whopper & Brighteyes are in a pirate ship, sailing on the ocean. Brighteyes is up in the crow's nest, looking through a telescope, and Whopper is steering."Oh, fifteen pups on a pirate ship, yo-ho-ho, and a fe-fi-flopper, a pirate's life is the life for me, yo-ho-ho, I'm Captain Long John Whopper!" Whopper sings.

"Avast, Captain!" Brighteyes calls.

"A vast what? Oh, wait…that's right, uhm, what seems to be the matter?"

"There's a typhoon a-headin' this way!"

She hands Whopper the telescope; he takes a look for himself, and, sure enough, there's a typhoon heading straight towards them. "Thar she blows! Shiver me timbers, and all that other pirate talk." Whopper exclaims. Brighteyes climbs down; Whopper rushes up to her. "The captain must always go down with the ship." says Whopper, at which point he removes his captain's hat and gives it to Brighteyes. "So, I'm electing you the new captain. Good luck."

_Talk about passing the buck! _she thinks.

The typhoon continues to near their ship, closer, ever closer…

All of this would have been really bad if they had actually been pirates. Fortunately, they were just two dogs playing in an old wooden tub out back of Holly's puppy pound.

The typhoon itself, unfortunately, was _very much _real. It careened down the sidewalk pulling posters off of fences, knocking over garbage cans, pulling leaves off of trees and generally leaving havoc in its wake.

Whopper and Brighteyes hop out of the tub and run over to Cooler and the other Pound Puppies who are raking leaves. "Typhoon alert! Man the lifeboats! Abandon ship! Typhoon alert! Everybody swim for your lives!" Whopper exclaims.

"Whoa, Whopper, I think you've been out to sea to long. What's the problem?" Cooler asks.

"Th-th-th-there's a typhoon coming _right at us_!" the little puppy replies.

"This sounds very suspiciously like another one of Whopper's tall tales." Scrounger whispers to Violet.

Scrounger is soon proven wrong when the typhoon breaks right through the pound's front gate. Holly Trueblood, manager of the pound and owner of the Pound Puppies, comes by to see what the commotion is about, at which point, the typhoon peters out, revealing its true identity as…a dog. He's a small light brown dog of the Basset Hound persuasion; he has dark brown ears and is wearing a yellow cap, and a blue-green t-shirt.

"Why, that's not a typhoon, it's only a little dog!" Holly says.

"Awwh, no one ever believes me." Whopper sighs.

The dog takes a piece of paper out of his pocket and looks it over. "This must be Holly's puppy pound."

"Well, what can we do for you, other than putting you on an industrial-strength leash?" Cooler inquires.

"My name's Buster, an' I was wonderin' if you folks might help me find a home."

"A _home?_" exclaims Nose Marie, as she strolls up to them, "What y'all _need_ is a li'l ol' _cage! _Just look at how you've messed up th' neighborhood!" she points to all the damage Buster has done. "Ain't y'all never been housebroken?"

"Well, I can't say for sure, But I have broken everything in several houses, if that counts."

"Well, we'll try to find you a home, Buster." Holly says (Albeit not sounding too confident of such).

Buster then transforms into a tornado again, and sets about destroying the Pound Puppies' houses, one after the other. "The only thing is," Howler whispers to Violet, "Who would want to adopt a natural disaster?"


	2. Meet the Belveshires

Buster zooms around, leaving destruction wherever he goes. Up on a hilltop not too far from the pound, Holly's wicked aunt Katrina Stoneheart sits in her house, becoming irritated at the commotion going on below. She throws a window open and shouts, "Holly! Keep those mangy mutts quiet! We're expecting important company and don't wish to be disturbed!"

Holly who, along with Cooler and Violet, is chasing after Buster, replies, "Yes, Aunty Katrina, ma'am, sir."

Katrina shuts the window. At that very moment, her daughter Brattina walks up to her, carrying Catgut, Katrina's pet, who seemed more like a liquid than a cat. Katrina's two henchmen, Flack and Tubbs, follow close behind.

"Who's coming, Mommie Dearest?" Brattina inquires.

"Investors, Brattina." Katrina says, schemingly rubbing her hands together. "Investors in a scheme to rid us of those Pound Puppies, once and for all."

At that very moment, a limo pulls up to Katrina's house. Catgut meows and points; Katrina hurries over to the window and throws it open.

"It's _them!_" Katrina observes the chauffer opening the door to the limo and a rich couple stepping out. The husband was elderly; bald with a white mustache that seemed almost too big for his face, wearing a black coat, matching pants, a red bowtie, and a monocle. His wife had curly brown hair stacked high on top of her head and wore a furry white coat that would've made a polar bear jealous, and a purple dress underneath that. Following them closely behind was a little boy with orange hair and thick, black glasses who was reading a book.

"Lord and Lady Belvershire, the third richest couple in the country, and I intend to take them for an absolute _fortune!_"

"Wow," says Flack, as he and Tubbs look out the next window, "Them's da richest millionaires I ever seen!"

"Wow-wow-wow-wo-o-o-o-w, look at the size of that car!" Howler howls, as he observes the Belvershires making their way up the steps leading to Katrina's door.

"They must be some really important folks." Scrounger notes.

"Yeah," Whopper says. "Like the Mayor of…Milwaukee!"

"Silly," Nose Marie says, "They's obviously classy, high-rollin' types, to whom ah kin relate! Ah could truly appreciate the aristocratic life…" She then proceeds to muse about the possibilities of living in a mansion and owning many fancy, expensive things. "Ahhh…"

"Lord and Lady Belvershire, what a pleasure it is to meet me, ahh, uhm, err, I mean, you." says Katrina, after she's led the Belvershires into her living room.

"Cgbnbjkbn, xzdegnlh, mvxegjbcf, by jove." Lord Belvershire says.

"Ahh, yes, how nice…" Katrina replies. _Good Grief_, she thinks, while looking at Lord Belvershire's face. _What a ridiculous mustache!_

Flack turns to Tubbs. "What did he say?"

"Duh, I think he said, 'Cgbnbjkbn, xzdegnlh, mvxegjbcf, by jove.'"

"Ahh, shut up!" Flack snaps, grabbing the end of Tubbs' scarf and flinging it over his mouth.

"And who is this cute widdle boy?" Katrina turns toward the little boy.

"Oh, that's our son, Hubert(snuf). He's quite the young rapscallion(snuf)." Lady Belvershire replies, with a wheezing snort.

"And what sweetie-weetie widdle children's book is widdle Hubie-wubie weading?"

"I'm reading about the molecular structure of deoxyribonucleic acid and its relationship to genetic progression." Hubert replies.

Uhm, whaddaya s'pose dat is?" Flack asks Tubbs.

"Can't say fer sure," Tubbs muses, rubbing his chin. "But judgin' from all da big words an' lack a' pictures ta color, it ain't no book I never read."

"Ye-heh-heh-es, well," Katrina chortles. "Let's get down to business. I'm going to offer you the most exciting investment of the decade: Stoneheart Estates, the condos of the future." she exclaims, whipping out a condo display with a flourish and setting it down on the table. She then dashes over to the TV set and pulls a DVD out of her pocket. "I think this commercial I've made says it all." Katrina says, as she puts it into the DVD player and presses the "play" button. An image of Brattina dancing in a patriotic uniform comes on the screen. Brattina sings(to the tune of, appropriately enough, "Yankee Doodle"),

"Katrina Stoneheart needs your cash,

She really needs your money,

She's gonna build Stoneheart Estates,

So, give her all your money!

Katrina's face appears at the lower right-hand corner of the screen. "Hi, friends. Katrina Stoneheart here, asking you to write a check _now._ Yes, help us get rid of that ugly dog pound, and put up some beautiful, expensive condos instead. And all it takes is money. _Your_ money!"

Flack turns to Katrina. "Eh, why did she rhyme 'money' with 'money?"

"Well, because nothing rhymes with 'money,' Honey."

"Really? Well, dat's funny…" says Tubbs.

Little did Katrina know that the dogs, along with Holly, had been watching her every move via the monitor in their underground surveillance room. "So, that's her plan! She's going to shut down the pound and put up condos!" Holly says.

"Not if we can help it," Cooler says. He turns to Buster. "Come with us, Buster, your tornado maneuver might be just the thing we need."

"Why, soitenly!" replies Buster. Cooler then steps down from his chair and dashes off; Buster follows him close behind.


	3. To Save the Pound

"Shbihgfebkn, czsgvbjhkgtdc, mncvxdervgn, cxdghbxervgy, by jove." Lord Belvershire applauds.

"_WHY DON'T YOU JUST SPEAK ENGLISH, YOU OLD_-ahh, hem, pardon me, but it seems the barking of those wretched dogs in the pound below us seems to have drowned out what your lovely husband was saying. Would you be so kind as to repeat it to me, Mrs. Belvershire?" Katrina says.

"Well(snuf), my husband was very impressed with your presentation. He'd like to invest a small sum of money in your business immediately(snuf), one million dollars, maybe?"

_GLUCK. _Now it was Katrina's turn to make an odd noise as she struggled not to swallow her own tongue; she quickly recovered, with a smile that would have frightened the Joker. "Ohh, why, how very gullible, ah, uhm, I mean, _generous_ of you." Katrina says, in a voice so sweet it would have put a starving bear off of honey. _Suddenly, Lord Belvershire's mustache seemed to be just the right size…_

"We're rich, Mommie Dearest, we're _rich!_" Brattina cheers, clapping her hands and prancing in place.

Katrina's two henchmen were equally enthused by this. "Ooh, a million dollars! Can you imagine, Tubbs?" Flack exclaims excitedly.

"Duh, is dat as much as a hundred?"

"As much? I tells ya, it's _twice_ as much!" Flack excitedly pumps his fists up and down. "Dis is only a million more dollars than we ever thought we'd see in our lives!" (Which was saying a lot, due to the fact that Flack and Tubbs only had a total of fifteen cents in their respective pockets.)

Lord Belvershire digs through his pockets with a nonplussed look on his face. "Xhbvhjfcdfgbkjnvbfc? Ynbjnhvhbhb!"

"Oh dear(snuf), it appears that my husband has misplaced his checkbook(snuf)."

"What? It can't be! He's got to find it! It's got to be here! Ahh, ahem, I mean, that _is_ a shame." Katrina says.

"Ah, no matter(snuf), We'll send our chauffer over with the check within the hour(snuf). Toodle-oo(snuf)!" The Belvershires then leave.

"Good-bye puppies," Brattina begins.

"And hello _MONEY!_" Katrina finishes, punctuating her sentence with a snicker.

Back at the pound, Holly and the dogs are weeping. "Goodness, dear(snuf), whatever might the matter be(snuf)?" Lady Belvershire asks Holly, as she approaches her.

"Well," Holly says, as she motions toward Katrina's house. "We're trying so hard to find homes for these dogs, and that evil woman wants to tear down the pound." The dogs then gather at Lady Belvershire's feet and weep.

"Mercy(snuf)! This is where that Stoneheart woman wants to build her condominiums(snuf)? Outrageous! We simply won't allow it(snuf)!"

"Vghcfgxgv, xscvghbgtcrexsd, axcfcvgvbhjnjm." Lord Belvershire adds.

"Excellent idea, dear(snuf)." Lady Belvershire turns to Holly. "My husband says if we may, we'd like to make a sizeable contribution(snuf)."

"You would?" Holly responds, elatedly.

Upon hearing this, the dogs cheer and hop up and down excitedly. (To everyone but Holly, of course, this only sounded like happy barking.) Nose Marie and Cooler hop into Lord and Lady Belvershire's respective arms and lick their faces.

"Thank you so much," Holly says, as the Belvershires gently set Cooler and Nose Marie down. "You don't know how much this means!"

Katrina, who had been happening by right at that very moment, had unfortunately heard every word of this. "So, try to finagle my clients into helping your pound, will you? Well, it's not going to work, Holly!"

"I'm afraid we've changed our minds, Mrs. Stoneheart(snuf). We're going to support this girl's cause instead of your condominiums(snuf)."

"Sorry, Aunty Katrina." Holly says.

"You're the one who's going to be sorry. Very sorry indeed." Katrina mumbles under her breath as she leaves.

Lord Belvershire turns to Holly. "By jove, wsyhncgvhbbhn, jbgcfcvb, ughvnbbn!"

"Yes(snuf), unfortunately, my husband has misplaced his checkbook(snuf), so why don't you come to our mansion for lunch, and we'll give you the check there(snuf)?"

"We'd love to!"

"Oh, and please do bring your dogs along, dear(snuf). Perhaps Hubert might like to have one for a pet(snuf)." Hubert momentarily peers up from his book, not looking quite so enthused about this.

The eight Pound Puppies wander out the front gate towards the Belvershire's limo. "Oh, Cooler we's a'goin' to luncheon at th' Belvershires. Maybe them extremely rich folks will want li'l ol' _ME_ fer their pet!" Nose Marie says, hopefully.

At that moment, Buster whirls ahead of them, momentarily stopping in front of them. "Do you folks s'pose they might want me for their pet instead?"

"No way, hon'" Nose Marie replies disdainfully. "Because you ain't comin'. You'd only wreck ever'thin'."


	4. A Nasty Scheme

The eight dogs hop into the limo, seating themselves next to Hubert who never so much as glances up from his book the whole time. As the chauffer starts off, Nose Marie turns to Cooler. "Have mercy, this could be mah dream come true!"

Cooler hears a sound from behind him and looks over his shoulder too see Buster, who has apparently tagged along on the back of the limo for the trip, knocking on the back window. "Your dream come true is about to become your worse nightmare."

Katrina and the others watch the limo drive away from an upstairs window. "Drat that miserable Holly and her sniveling dogs!" Katrina scowls. "I'll get the better of them soon enough!"

"What'cha gonna do, Mommie Dearest, huh, huh, What'cha gonna do?" Brattina asks.

"Ah, I've got a scheme that's a real honey, Honey."

"Dere she goes wit' dat rhymin' stuff again." Flack whispers to Tubbs.

"Supposing the Belvershires think those dogs destroyed their beautiful mansion." Katrina says schemingly.

"I _LIKE_ it, Mommie Dearest, I _LIKE_ it!" Brattina sneers.

"Duh, but how does ya plan ta do it, boss?" Tubbs asks.

"Simple as this." Katrina turns to Catgut. "Catgut, go find a bunch of your nastiest friends. We're going to nail those dogs-with _your nails_." she says, punctuating her sentence with a nasty chuckle. The mean cat snickers nastily in response.

The limo arrives at the mansion's front door, and the eight dogs hop out. "Whatta ritzy joint! A feller could really get ta like it here!" Buster says from the back of the limo. He then proceeds to transform into a tornado again, and whirls up next to Cooler.

"Buster, you gotta nix the tornado routine around here!" Cooler says anxiously. Buster, who apparently doesn't hear Cooler, sucks him into his vortex. "BUSTER-R-R-R-R!" Cooler yells, as Buster spins him across the front yard; they both end up crashing into the fountain.

"That Buster," Brighteyes giggles. "He's only been here ten seconds and he's already made a big splash." She turns to Nose Marie, who's standing next to her. "Get it, Nose Marie? Get it? Get it?"

"Ah got it, ah got it, like a migraine." the bloodhound replies exasperatedly.

Cooler and Buster climb out of the fountain and dry themselves off. "Now, mellow out, cousin," Cooler says. "If you wreck anything around here, you'll be wrecking it for Holly and the pound."

Holly and the nine dogs then proceed into the mansion, little realizing that Katrina and her crew are watching them from some nearby bushes. "All the dogs are inside, Mommie Dearest." Brattina informs Katrina.

"Now's your chance, Catgut." Katrina informs her pet.

"Meow!" Catgut hops from the bush to the ground.

Flack climbs out of the bushes and faces Catgut; Tubbs walks to the edge of the bushes and looks out at them while crouching on his knees. (Well, crouching as well as he could, at least-the size of his belly made this task rather difficult.)

"Now, youse understand what ya's gotta do, right?" Flack inquires to Catgut. "You and ya's friends gotta go in dere an' tear up everythin' in sight!"

"Me-yes,sir!" Catgut whistles, and three cats who are just as fat as he is rush up to him.

"Now, make extra sure them rich folks don't see ya's, we want them lousy mutts ta get da blame fer it."

"HAW HAW HAW!" Tubbs chortles from his leafy hiding place.

"What're ya laffin' at, pea brain?" Flack snarls, shooting a backwards glare at him. (One would have had to take his word for this-his hat always covers his eyes.)

"Hee hee, you're talkin' ta _cats!_"

"Eh, surprised I'd wanna ta talk ta someone wit' a IQ over 18, were ya?" the skinny dognapper snaps.

The mean cats then tiptoe off to do their job. "Good luck…and have a _ripping_ good time!" Katrina bids them, with a nasty laugh.

Back at the mansion, everyone is sitting down to dinner. Holly and the Belvershires sit at a large dining table while the dogs sit at a smaller separate one. A butler comes by the dog's table and sets nine dishes of dog food in front of them.

"Mmm, this sure smells _delectable!_" Buster says. He then proceeds to dig into his food with a loud slurp.

Nose Marie looks annoyed. "Buster, _stop! _Where is your etiquette?"

"Eh, I dunno," Buster responds, bewildered. "I musta left it in my other suit."

Nose Marie gives an exasperated groan. "Jus' do what _ah_ do," she demonstrates by picking up a spoon. "There, now y'all pick up th' same spoon ah jus' did."

Buster copies her example, then, after about a second's hesitation, digs into his food again. "Ahh, delooshus, but I don't unnerstand what difference dis spoon's supposed ta make." Nose Marie's only response is an aggravated glare


	5. The Wrecking Crew

Holly and the others are so involved in this that they don't hear Flack and Tubbs sneaking in the back door. They enter the library; Flack quickly looks around, then calls from the doorway, "Da coast is clear, c'mon!"

Upon hearing this, Catgut and his crew hurry in. "Meooow-meow!" Catgut commands the other cats, who bare their claws and set about tearing up everything in sight. Catgut snickers sinisterly at this.

"That was a wonderful lunch, Lady Belvershire, thank you!" says Holly, as she and the Belvershires traipse into the front room.

"Why, you're quite welcome, dear(snuf). And now, my husband will endeavor to locate that wayward checkbook of his(snuf)."

"By jove, vcfgvhjnbbgf, cdqwfvhgbn, jgtvfdx." Lord Belvershire and his wife then stroll away.

"Gee, I bet in a joint like dis, even da _termites_ are rich!" Buster says, as the nine dogs enter the room.

"And to think, ah'm gonna call it _home!_" Nose Marie says, anticipating. Just then, she has an awful thought. "But what if they don't pick _me? _Oh, whatevah would ah do?"

"Don't worry, Nose Marie," Howler says. "If it looks like they're about to pick me, I'll roll over and play dead." He then dramatically demonstrates same. "Ack, they got me! Tell my sweetheart I love her, and bury me not on the lone praree! Awooo!" he then dramatically collapses to the ground. All the dogs applaud, and Barkerville places a trophy in Howler's hands. Howler opens one eye. "Soon to be a major motion picture." he says.

"Don't worry, Nose Marie," Violet says next. "If it looks like they're about to pick me, I'll make them think I'm wild."

Brighteyes, dressed in cheerleader garb complete with pompoms, is the next to put her two cents in. "Yeah, yeah, they won't want me, 'cause I'll make them think I have fleas! Yaaay, FLEAS! Yaaay, FLEAS!" The yellow lab then notices that the others are looking at her oddly. "Oh. Hi." she says, blushing.

"Never to worry, my dear," Barkerville adds next. "I shall simply make them think I'm noisy."

"And I'll make 'em think I chew shoes," Scrounger adds next. "Come to think of it, I kinda like chewin' on stuff anyways, so I won't have to put on much of a façade."

Last to put in his two cents is Whopper. "I'll make them think I eat too much, that'll ruin my chances, yeah. And I also won't have to put on much of a façade, 'cause boy, can I _eat_! I once ate an entire buffalo, no, wait, it was the entire _city_ of Buffalo, yeah, yeah, and it was full of cats, great big twenty-story cats with fifteen-foot claws! It was, 'Attack of the Killer Kitties!'"

"Whopper," says Scrounger. "Haven't we all told you a million times never to exaggerate?"

"Aw, gee," the little puppy responds. "You guys never believe me."(Could you blame them, though?)

Back in the library, the mean cats continue to wreck everything in sight. Catgut joins them by merrily knocking books off the shelves, snickering as he does. "Heh, dis is gonna be _great_," Flack snickers, while slyly stroking his beard. "Them rich folks'll think them mutts were da ones what did da damage, an' let us shut down da pound fer sure!"

One of the cats happens up behind Tubbs and a loud _RRIP! _is heard. Tubbs turns around, revealing a large hole in the back of his pants. "I think de're gettin' a little too carried away, though! Hey, you crazy cats, be careful! I ain't not a piece a' furniture!"

"Yeah, I'd think not, a piece a' furniture'd be smarter." Flack responds sarcastically.

"Of all da days to wear da underpants wit' da li'l pink bunny rabbits on 'em." Tubbs mumbles to himself as he ambles away.

Holly, Lady Belvershire, and Hubert (Who still never looked up from his book for a second) traipse out back to the swimming pool. "(Snuf)Now, where could that husband of mine be? He's certainly having a lot of difficulty locating that checkbook of his(snuf)!" Lady Belvershire muses, looking all around the pool.

Lord Belvershire, clad, appropriately enough, in scuba gear, sticks his head up out of the pool. "Sfcvhgbjn, cdxdgvhb, xdfcgvbnbn!" he says, before diving back under.

"Well(snuf), he's sure to find it sooner or later, and in the meantime(snuf), Hubert can select a dog to call his own." Lady Belvershire turns to her son. "Doesn't that sound wonderful, Hubert(snuf)?"

Hubert looks up from his book and adjusts his glasses. "Frankly, I'd rather be working on my theory of time and space."


	6. Pick a Pet

"Okay, Pound Puppies," Holly says, turning to the dogs. "Anyone want to be Hubert's pet?"

She first turns to Whopper, who's gobbling food out of an enormous dog dish; he pauses for a second and shakes his head no.

Holly then turns to Violet, who's rapidly hopping up and down and yipping wildly, then starts rapidly chasing her tail; like Whopper, she also pauses and shakes her head no.

Holly then turns to Brighteyes, who's scratching, scratching, scratching; again, she pauses and shakes her head no.

Holly then turns to Barkerville, who's howling long and loudly; yet again, he pauses and shakes his head no.

Holly then turns to Scrounger, who's vigorously gnawing on an old shoe; yet again, he pauses and shakes his head no.

Holly then turns to Howler, who promptly collapses to the floor dramatically.

As a last-ditch effort, she promptly turns to Cooler, who simply looks up and says, "Meow."

"Oh my(snuf)," Lady Belvershire says, somewhat nonplussed. "None of them appear very…willing, do they(snuf)?"

She had no sooner said this when Nose Marie marches by beating a drum _while_ playing a bugle and wearing a headband with a neon sign reading, "PICK ME! PICK ME!" suspended from it.

"My goodness(snuf), this one looks _very_ willing! Hubert, this dog may truly be the one for you(snuf)."

At that very moment, Lord Belvershire, still clad in scuba gear, runs up to them holding his wayward checkbook. "Wfcgvhbhjn, cfgvbjbhjunm, ujnb!"

"You've found your checkbook, Lord Belvershire?" Holly inquires.

"Rrgbjhnkjmjb, gfcfvghbh, xcfgvhb, by jove."

"Oh, it was in the deep end of the pool all along(snuf). Let's go inside and, uhm, find a waterproof pen(snuf)." Holly and the Belvershires then walk back inside.

"How did it go, Nose Marie?" Cooler inquires, as he happens up to her.

"No luck, darlin'," the bloodhound replies, discouraged. "An' jus' when ah had almos' got Hubert to crack a smile."

Back in the library, the nasty cats continue their task. "Heh, it's all jus' a matter a' time!" Flack gloats; he quickly turns around and notices that the cats are gone."Hey, where did them crazy cats get to?" Flack wanders off to look for the cats; he eventually finds them in the dining room, munching on an enormous roast turkey on the dinner table. "Hey, youse cats, dis ain't no time fer a snack! Get back ta wreckin' da place like ya's supposed ta!"

The cats ignore him and continue eating. "Honestly, didja ever see anything' like dat, Tubbs?" Flack suddenly notices Tubbs is nowhere to be seen. "Tubbs? Hey, Tubbs where are ya's?" He scouts the room for his associate, whom he soon finds at the end of the table, gobbling down food.

"Huh? Did you jus' say somethin', Flack?" Flack's only response is an exasperated groan.

At that very moment, Cooler and Nose Marie hear a crash from inside. "What was _that?_" Nose Marie exclaims anxiously. Panic-stricken, The eight Pound Puppies rush inside and give a mutual gasp of shock at what they see. The entire library has been ravaged; furniture has been knocked over, curtains and tablecloths are torn, books have been knocked off of shelves, knickknacks broken, couches and easy chairs shredded, destruction as far as the eye can see.

"This place looks like it was hit by a snow cone…ah, uhm, I mean, a toledo…ah, uhm, I mean, a windwhirl…ah, uhm, what I mean is-awoo-oo-oo, _Buster?_" Howler states. The nasty cats snicker from behind a ravaged couch.

"_BUSTER?_" the other dogs echo in shock; they then run off to find him. "BUSTER! WHERE ARE YOU?"

"I'm in here." responds Buster, who's in the security room, sitting in front of the monitors.

"Buster, where have you _been?_" Nose Marie asks, accusingly.

"Right here, watchin' th' teevee. Kinda borin', though; it's th' same thing on every channel."

"This isn't a TV, it's a security system," Cooler informs him. He walks up to the monitors and picks up a DVD sitting in front of them. "They got this whole place hooked up to video cameras." Cooler then proceeds to turn on one of the monitors, showing the demolished library.

"Oh, Buster, ah cannot _believe_ you!" Nose Marie exclaims angrily.

"I didn't do it, I promise!" Buster responds in defense.

"Ooh, you little demolition derby," Nose Marie glowers as she advances angrily towards him. "What 'til ah get mah hands on _you!_"

"Hey, what's going on?" Whopper says, as he hurries after them; he stops short outside the library. Looking inside, he observes the nasty cats tearing up everything with the two dognappers looking on. "Flack and Tubbs? With Catgut and his friends? I've gotta tell Cooler about this!" Whopper exclaims, then he stops short. "No…wait…he'd never believe me."


	7. Buster Gets Busted

Buster rushes into the library. "Wow, what a mess," he says, upon observing all the destruction. "The maid must be slacking."

He had no sooner said this when Cooler rushes in and tackles him. "Gotcha!"

"I didn't do it! It wasn't me! I ain't even been in this room!"

"Merciful Heavens!" Lady Belvershire exclaims, upon entering the room and observing the dogs there amongst the detritus. "You _nasty, nasty _dogs(snuf)! You've destroyed our beautiful home(snuf)!"

"There must be some mistake," Holly says in the dogs' defense. "These dogs would never do anything like this."

"Wgcvghn, cghvhbjnm, dcgvbhnnmnh, gcgvbhnbjknkj, dchgvhbn!" Lord Belvershire exclaims angrily.

"My husband says you can forget about the check(snuf). Now, we'll thank you to leave, and take those destructive dogs with you(snuf)." The dogs all look on sadly.

"Mission accomplished." Katrina snickers slyly from the bushes as she observes these goings-on. She and her crew then share a nasty laugh over all of this.

Back at the pound, in the underground surveillance area, Nose Marie is absolutely inconsolable. "Fame…riches… social position…_GONE!_…gone _FOREVER!_" she weeps.

Aw, come now, Nose Marie, you have to look on the bright side." Brighteyes says, in hope of consoling her.

"Really? How?"

"Well, for one thing, you still have your friends, and we all think you're super-neato peachy-keen with whipped cream and a cherry on top!"

"Why don't ya stop before y'all give me a sugar rush!" the bloodhound then proceeds to weep some more.

"Cheer up, Nose Marie," says Cooler, who's sitting in front of one of the monitors. "Things could be worse." At that moment he observes, onscreen, Katrina phoning the Belvershires. "Ooh, apparently, things _are_ worse."

"So, you'd like to invest in my condo project after all?" Katrina inquires; she then listens to the reply. "Oh, yes, _yes_,we'll bring the model and the DVD right over." Katrina hangs up the phone. "_THEY'RE GOING TO GIVE US MONEY!_"

"We're gonna be rich, we're gonna be rich, knock down the puppy pound, 'cause we're gonna be rich!" Brattina gloats as she dances with Catgut.

"Ooh, we're gonna be rich, ain't this _exciting_, Tubbs?" Flack exclaims enthusiastically.

Tubbs unenthusiastically scratches his belly for about a second, then gives a bored yawn. Annoyed, Flack gives Tubbs a swift punch to his belly. "Oof! Oh, uh, yeah, we're gonna be rich, yeah, dat's excellent." Tubbs quickly responds, brushing off his front.

"This isn't good," Holly says. "With the Belvershires' money behind her, Aunty Katrina will boot us out of here."

"And it's all _your_ fault," Nose Marie angrily says to Buster. "You _blew_ mah chances a' getting' adopted, an' you _blew_ the Belvershires house into _ITTY-BITTY PIECES_!"

"But, I really didn't do it. Y'gotta believe me!"

"Why don't y'all do us all a favor an' jus' _go away_?" Nose Marie angrily shoves him.

"B-b-b-b-but…" Buster begins. "I…just…didn't do it." he finishes, as he sadly spins out the door.

"Buster, wait!" Holly says.

"Please, Buster, don't leave." says Violet. Unfortunately, Buster doesn't hear either of them.


	8. The Old Bait-and-Switch

"Golly, Nose Marie," says Brighteyes. "That was awfully mean."

"She's right," adds Violet. "A Pound Puppy really oughtn't to act this way."

"Honestly, he really didn't mean any harm," Barkerville adds. "He's never had a home or family, so no one's ever cared enough to teach him any manners."

"But, Buster wasn't the one who smashed up the Belvershires' mansion." says Whopper, who's sitting next to Cooler.

"But if he didn't, then who did?" Cooler inquires.

"A bunch of mean cats did!"

"Sure, Whopper, sure, the 'monster kitties with the fifteen-foot claws,' right?"

"No, it was Catgut and his pals, and Flack and Tubbs were there, too; they probably set the whole thing up."

"You saw Catgut and his pals at the mansion, as well as Flack and Tubbs?_ WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL US SOONER_?"

"_BECAUSE NO ONE EVER BELIEVES ME_!"

"So, Buster didn't do it after all." says Barkerville.

"But, how-w-w-w will we prove it?" Howler howls.

"Well, just leave that to your old pal, Cooler. Pound Puppies, let's get pounding!" All of them, save for Nose Marie, then hurry off.

"Poor Buster, ah was so cruel to him," Nose Marie says sadly. "Ah needs ta find him an' tell him ah'm sorry an' that ah was wrong."

Katrina's car is parked outside the front gate of the Belvershires' mansion; Tubbs hauls Katrina's condo display out of the trunk. "Lift wit' ya's back, not ya's legs!" Flack orders him.

"Duh, but Flack, I'm only liftin' with my hands." Tubbs replies, as he slowly ambles toward the door.

"Hurry up, Tubbs! We don't want to keep the Belvershires waiting." Katrina, who's toting Catgut in her arms, calls as she and the rest of her crew enter the mansion.

"I'm doin' da best I can here. Dis thing mus' weigh a ton or sumthin'."

"Look who's talkin'." Flack mumbles under his breath.

(The display was heavy for good reason; unbeknownst to any of them, Holly and the Pound Puppies were hiding inside of it. "I hope this plan works, Cooler." Holly whispers.)

"Qfcgvgnmjknhgbv, vgvbnjgtvf, ewbgvhbn, by jove." Lord Belvershire says to Katrina the instant she comes inside. Brattina, Flack and Tubbs, the latter of whom is still carrying the display, follow close behind her.

"Lord and Lady Belvershire, I'm honored." Katrina waves her arms out behind her, apparently forgetting that she was carrying Catgut, and accidentally drops him on Brattina, causing her to lose her balance.

"_Whoooa, Mommie!_" Brattina wails as she staggers backwards into a surprised Flack, who stumbles backwards into Tubbs, who topples over, dropping the display with a resounding _SMASH_, depositing Holly and the dogs behind the couch in the process.

"_OH, TUBBS, YOU CLUMSY OX!…_I, uhm, I, ah, mean, are you alright, dear?" Katrina says.

"Oogh, I think so." the fat dognapper responds dazedly, as he slowly climbs to his feet._ Boy, dat's a relief, _he thinks. _I thought fer a second she wuz gonna be mad or somethin'. _

"Rome prob'ly fell 'cuz ya dropped it, ya klutz." Flack snaps.

While no one is looking, Howler sneaks behind the TV set, and Cooler tiptoes into the security room. "Ehm, perhaps we should begin, Mrs. Stoneheart(snuf)."

"Oh, by all means. Let's talk turkey. Or, better yet, let's talk money. _Your _money!"

"By jove, rfvhbnmk, tgbhjnkj!"

"Uhm, does that mean he has his checkbook this time?"

"Oh, yes(snuf), my husband is ready to make a _sizeable_ investment(snuf)."

"How _delightful!_"

While in the security room, Cooler walks over to a shelf full of security DVDs, he looks the shelf over and picks out one with the word "LIBRARY" on its case. He then sneaks over to the doorway, checks to see if the coast is clear, then passes the DVD to Whopper, who's hiding behind the couch. Whopper then tosses it over to the TV set; as if on cue, a mechanical hand pops out of Howler's hat and grabs it. Howler then tiptoes over to Katrina's purse and swaps the security DVD with hers. "Now _that's_ using your head!" Cooler says.

"Not bad." Barkerville replies.

"Not good." Scrounger says cynically.


	9. The Fight Club

Flack and Tubbs are sitting slouched at a nearby table while Katrina and the Belvershires chat. "Do you, uh, unnerstand anythin' them folks is sayin'?" Tubbs inquires.

"You was listenin' at all? I lost 'em at about three 'snufs' in!"

"Yeah, like dat," Tubbs folds his hand under his pudgy chin. "At least da boss ain't bothered by all dis."

Calm though Katrina may have appeared on the surface, she was being slowly (or would "quickly" be a better descriptive term?) driven mad by the combination of Lord Belvershire's unintelligible speech and Lady Belvershire's constant sniffling. Her mind entertained thoughts of tying Lord Belvershire's floppy mustache into a large bow knot and stuffing it into his mouth, and sticking Lady Belvershire's sniveling head in a washing machine and turning it on to "spin." _If only she hadn't needed their money so badly…_

"Yes, well(snuf), Might we ask to see your DVD presentation one last time(snuf)?"

"Oh, absolutely, by all means." replies Katrina, who had somehow (impossibly) managed to maintain composure throughout all this. She sticks the DVD into the DVD player and presses the "play" button. To everyone's surprise, rather than Katrina's commercial, an image of several cats (including Catgut) wrecking the library plays on the screen.

"Tbjnjkmk! Rgvhbj, yuhnjbghvrfcdcgvb, jhnhyvfgcfgb!"

"Why, Mrs. Stoneheart(snuf), that's _your_ cat destroying _our_ library!"

Suddenly, an image of Flack and Tubbs appears on the screen with Flack saying, "Them rich folks'll think them mutts were da ones what did da damage, an' let us shut down da pound fer sure!"

"And aren't those your associates(snuf)?"

"Aw, no, we jus' work for her." Tubbs replies helpfully (or should we say _not-so -_helpfully).

"You're an idiot." Flack grumbles.

Katrina is truly at a loss for words now. It doesn't much matter, because Lord Belvershire says, "Rgvhbnjmnmkmk, gyhbnmn!" as to which Lady Belvershire responds, "I couldn't agree with my husband more(snuf), We certainly won't be doing business with someone like you(snuf)!" And with that, she promptly tears up the check.

As the pieces of the check flutter to the ground, something inside Katrina snaps. "YOU!" she screams at Lord Belvershire. "YOU OVER-STUFFED, MEALY-MOUTHED, SLOBBERING DIRT CLOD! I WILL SHOVE THAT ROAD KILL MUSTACHE DOWN YOUR LOUSY THROAT!" And with that, she lunges at Lord Belvershire, seizing the offending mustache with both hands.

"Mommie Dearest, what are you doing?" cries Brattina. She turns to the wide-eyed Flack and Tubbs. "Well, don't just sit there, _do something!_"

"Who?" says Flack.

"Us?" says Tubbs.

"No, the other two idiots. Go help Mommie _now_, you speed bumps!"

"Fine," says Flack. "Tubbs, you grab her hands, I'll grab her feet."

"Aw, ya always give me th' hard jobs!"

Flack grabs Katrina around the ankles, but Katrina still has a death grip on Lord Belvershire's mustache. "Thbjnjkm! Rgtfvhbjnkmkm, hbhvbgb!" Lord Belvershire exclaims in protest.

Flack turns to Tubbs. "Well, don't just _stand_ there, you dolt, _do_ something!"

"Hmm," Tubbs muses for a second. "Oh! I got a idea, be right back." The fat dognapper then dashes into the next room; he briefly sticks his head in the doorway. "Don't go anywhere!" Tubbs shortly returns with a pair of scissors which he uses to snip off the tips of Lord Belvershire's mustache, separating him from Katrina. "Shave 'n a haircut, two bits!" he says with a chuckle.

"Why, this is an outrage!" Lord Belvershire exclaims in a surprisingly coherent voice. "I'll thank you to leave _right now_, before I have the law on you!"

"Say," says Howler, from their hiding place behind the couch, "It really _was_ the mustache, after all."

"I wonder how Lady Belvershire would sound with a Kleenex." Violet adds.

Flack and Tubbs carry Katrina, still kicking and screaming, to the car. "Golly," says Tubbs. "She's tuffer than dat pitbull we tried ta pilfer last week."

"Please don't remind me a' _dat_." Flack responds disdainfully. "Okay, Tubbs, I got her in da car, now let's blow this taco stand."

"Duh, okay." Tubbs shifts the car into high gear.

Brattina, who had apparently been forgotten in all this commotion, rushes after the rapidly disappearing car with Catgut at her heels. "_HEY! HEY! DON'T FORGET ME, YOU TWO DUNDERHEADS!_" she hollers after them. "_MOMMIE DEAREST, THEY'RE LEAVING ME!_" Holly and the dogs laugh as Katrina and her cacophonous entourage disappear into the distance.


	10. A Wonderful New Home

While all of this is going on, Nose Marie stands on a street corner, under a streetlight, calling out to Buster. "Buster, oh Buster, Ah'm sorry for how ah treated you, please come back to the pound." The bloodhound punctuates her sentence with a long, sad howl, then drops down on all fours, with tears welling up in her eyes. "Ah'm sorry, Buster, _truly_ sorry, ah was _wrong._"

Buster, who fortunately was just behind a nearby building, had heard every word. "Now how about that," the brown bassett hound says, as tears well up in his own eyes. "Who'da thunk it? Someone truly cares about me." He then transforms into a tornado and whirls over to where Nose Marie is, sweeping her up in the process. "Why don't we go back to the pound, Nose Marie?"

"Why Buster, y'all done swept me right off'n mah li'l ol' _feet!_" She punctuates her sentence with a giggle.

The Belvershires meet Holly and the dogs back at the pound. "And we'd like to _double _the amount we were going to donate to your pound(snuf)." Lady Belvershire says, as her husband hands Holly the check.

"Why, thank you, this really means a lot to us." Holly replies.

"Think nothing of it, dear(snuf)." Lady Belvershire then turns to her son. "And now, Hubert(snuf), perhaps you'd like to pick a dog for your own(snuf)."

"Very well, mother. Now, let's see…" He first turns to Whopper, who shakes his head no, then to Violet, Cooler, Scrounger, Howler, Brighteyes, and Barkerville who all do the same. He finally turns to Nose Marie, who not only does the same, but pushes the back gate open, at which point, what appears to be a tornado (but actually is obviously Buster) whirls in.

"Huh?" Hubert says in astonishment. Buster promptly sucks Hubert into his vortex and whirls him around. "Hey, cut it out! Ha ha, ha ha ha!" Hubert laughs delightedly.

"Oh my word, I've never seen Hubert laugh before(snuf)!" Lady Belvershire exclaims elatedly.

Hubert and Buster both laugh joyfully as Buster gleefully licks Hubert's face. "I've never seen anything like him. Can I keep him please, Mom and Dad?" Buster turns and winks at Nose Marie, who winks twice in response.

"Well, it looks like Buster's found a loving owner." says Violet happily.

"And a big, big, big, awoo-oo-oo, _BIG_ beautiful home." Howler adds.

"And you, Nose Marie, have a big, big, big, awoo-oo-oo, _BIG_ beautiful heart." Cooler says, as he gives her a hug.

"Why, thank you, Cooler Snookums, but us genteel high-class folks would say it _another _way."

"Really? How so?"

"They'd say, 'Whjnjgvrcgvhb, bjnhvfcdffg, by jove."

"By jove, rfvghbhbnjn, bgvdfcfgvhbhnj." Cooler replies.

"Adcgvhbjnuj, hnnngbh!" Nose Marie adds. At that very moment, Howler strolls up to them. "But, if y'all even _think_ a' cuttin' off mah whiskers, ah'll make ya eat that hat!" Nose Marie says.

**The End**


End file.
